She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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