Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
