the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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