hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
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