shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I just want to make out with him forever
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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