GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
