I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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