I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize