That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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