I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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