wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
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