Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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