That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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