New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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