And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
