I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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