Your tits are I can't wait for
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
