In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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