i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize