1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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