An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
