Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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