nut hugger
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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