ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
