Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
