a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
