like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
