The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
