So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Randomize