she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
