let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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