Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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