its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
