Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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