You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize