Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
