That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize