don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
