Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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