There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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