so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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