Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize