it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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