No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
