i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Just pee around me
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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