Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
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we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
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Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.