I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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