Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
