someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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