in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
